Thursday, June 2, 2016

Of Stray Kitten and Relationship pt. 1

Stray kittens, puppies, maybe baby birds(what are these called?), and other animals behave in certain ways. We could probably say that these are encoded in their genes? Well, the ways they behaved are somehow pretty much similar, being animal instincts and such. While it is unarguably true that there are some marked difference between the way a dog and a cat behave towards their owners(while dogs regard their owners as "Gods", cats think the other way round, they, the cats themselves, are the "Gods"), there are some natural instinct that are inherently similar - their response towards fear and perceived betrayal(at least to my own observation, this may not be a universal truth).

Take note that I mentioned "perceived" betrayal. Perceived betrayal is what I would simply call as a situation where "you did something that I think betrays me but I'm not sure if it's actually true", or in a more sophisticated way, I would call it as a situation where "I don't know why you did that and I don't care if you did that for my own good but I don't feel good about you doing that and thus I believe that's betrayal". I don't know if any of you reading this even understands what I was blabbering about in the previous sentence but in simple words, perceived betrayal is an act we perceive or believe as being betrayal but is it actually betrayal? We don't know. Most people will just go with the latter and just say "I don't feel good about it, so it is indeed betrayal". Most, not all, don't be offended dear some who are not in that category.

So, after I've done beating around the bush and kill lots of innocent animals living in the bush by accident, I'll get into the main point(or at least I'll try). Today, we(my friends and I) found a stray kitten. Talking about kitten, did you know in my lab there's... wait, I think I just killed another innocent animal... ops... guess I better get back into track... It was very scared of humans. It was probably hurt by humans before, It ran when we approached and hissed when it was cornered. Somehow we managed to catch it and calmed it down. So, we got the kitten to a vet and it was prescribed with lots of medication for the worms and such. We took the kitten back and had to feed the medication to the kitten. Just like any kid would be, the kitten resisted, it pushed and kicked with its tiny paws so that we couldn't get the syringe with the medication to its mouth. However, despite all those struggling, it's just a tiny kitten and we managed to feed it the medication in the end. It was obviously displeased as it started to do the action mimicking spitting but since kittens don't spit, it started frothing instead, The medication probably tasted very bad but there's more(there's a total of 3 different medications to take).

Anyway, after taking all those medication, it is obvious from its struggling that it wants to get free and get as far away as possible from us, these "monsters who are mistreating it by forcing some ill-tasting poison down its throat", these "betrayers", these people whom it had entrusted its life with but end up "hurting" it. It clawed its way away from my grip, but I held firm(not hard but firm). I made sure it couldn't claw on me, holding its limbs pressed to its body with one palm and stroking it with another to calm it down. I know, more that anything it wanted to be free from me, the perceived betrayer. However, I also know that if I let it go now, allowing it to take me in as a betrayer, loosing its trust in me, it may never let me get near it again, and that would make it harder for us to feed it medications for the next whole week and we would be unable to help it. Like they used to say, "I can only help you if you trust in me". So I held firm, not letting go until it calmed down and got comfortable again in my palm. Then, when I let it go, it came back by itself towards me, climbing up to my crossed legs and sat on my lap laying its head down on my side, I know for now I've gained back its trust but tomorrow, when we feed it the medication another time, will it be another cycle of "betrayal"?

Treating this kitten somehow makes me think of relationships as humans. Humans are scientifically speaking an evolved animal though many would dispute against this based on a religious stand. However, I'm not starting a debate on this. Instead, what I wanted to say is, human also have an inherent way to face fear and perceived betrayal. Just like that kitten, your significant others may shun you away, telling you to leave him/her alone when he/she perceived betrayal no matter if it's true or not. No matter how hard you try to get to him/her, your words never seem to reach. At this moment, many people would probably think "I'll leave for now and maybe time will fix everything". This may work or it may backfire. Sometimes, what he/she really need is a hug, an assurance that you have not betrayed him/her, that you cared for him/her, that you love him/her and maybe that is all it really takes to get you words to reach her. If you leave him/her now, it may be the end... However... HOWEVER! If you really did betray that significant other, then may you burn and rot in (you know where)....

Peace~ Mao~

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